Are You Proactive?

Proactivity is not exactly a new concept. Stoic philosophy promoted the idea of concerning yourself only with the things you could influence — your thoughts and your actions. Everything else is indifference; not worth worrying about. The Buddhists also believe that there are no inherently good or bad events. Only our judgements of those events make them good or bad, and we are free to choose. 

“Reactive people are often affected by their physical environment. If the weather is good, they feel good. If it isn’t, it affects their attitude and performance. Proactive people carry their own weather with them.”

-Stephen Covey

APPLYING PROACTIVITY

How can we apply this thinking to our everyday lives? How can we make the shift from reactivity to proactivity? Here are a few things you can have a go at:

1. Notice your reactive behaviour. Begin with the little things, not with the death of a loved one or the suffering of innocent people. Just the everyday situations; in work perhaps, or in your relationships. Notice your reactive behaviour when it occurs, in the moment. Also note how many others do the same, and how easy it is to be reactive. Don’t judge, just watch.

2. Alter your language. Our language tells us a lot about our level of reactivity or proactivity. Reactive people tend to use “I can’t”, “If only”, “I have to”. These phrases are shifting the blame to outside circumstances, getting rid of responsibility. Consciously change these to more positive, empowering phrases. “I can”, “I will”, “I want to”. A simple change in language can make a big difference.

3. Analyse your past mistakes. Whilst you can control your actions, you cannot always control the consequences. Invariably, you will have made mistakes in your past — we all have. But we cannot change the past, so dwelling on those mistakes is a form of reactive behaviour. Instead, accept that you made them, take whatever you can learn from them, let them go, and move on.

4. Make commitments. Making goals and working towards them can help empower you and reinforce the control you have over your life. If you achieve what you set out to, you realise that you can be responsible for your circumstances, regardless of the external forces.

WRAP UP

Becoming more proactive is essentially a practice of mindfulness. It involves you becoming more aware of everything that is going on in the moment.

During your practice, you’ll notice how easy it is to slip into reactive mode. You’ll realise how so many others live their lives on reactive autopilot.

As with everything, take your time and don’t be too hard on yourself. We've been raised in quite a reactive world, and have developed lifelong habits that will take time to change.

That’s not to say we can’t change though. Just take it slow, enjoy the self-reflective process, and savour that feeling of taking charge of your life.